My Christmas and New Traditions

Christmas is usually a whirlwind. When Jose and I got together, our Christmas season blew up. I had traditionally spent Christmas eve with the godparents (Dalissa w/ her family and Melanie w/John’s family) and Christmas morning at home and Christmas day with the grandparents (my mom and John’s mom). Jose traditionally spent Christmas Eve with his family and Christmas day with his best friend, now CJ’s godfather, Pedi. Needless to say, when we got together, we tried to make it all work. After CJ was born, the holiday became more and more difficult to control and I started enjoying Christmas less and less even though it’s one of my favorite time of the year. The rushing from house to house took away from the season and made it something I began to dread.

Then we went to NC. While we were there, our holidays became our holidays again. They were spent at home enjoying them with the children, the way that I believe they are intended. I think of those days and they just make me smile. They were relaxing and full of joy. Don’t get me wrong, I did miss some of the hustle and bustle that I had been used to in the holidays past.

Fear not, the hustle and bustle came back when we moved back. Once again we were thrown into all the different houses that we had to go to on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. We tried to fit it all in because we had been away from it for so long. But it didn’t take long to realize that our holiday was no longer our holiday again.

This year, we got our holiday back. Since my New Year’s resolution (spoiler alert) is to simplify, I decided to start early. Jose and I decided to not go to anyone’s house except to his mom’s on Christmas Eve. We would have to make other arrangements. I want to spend Christmas at home with my kids. I want to stay in my PJ’s and spend the day watching the kids enjoy their presents. To be completely honest, I didn’t think that I would even be able to see Larissa for Christmas because she was going to Brandon’s sister’s house.

So how did my holiday unravel?

Christmas Eve, both Jose and I worked. The day before, I dropped CJ off with Jose’s mom and I dropped Nathan off at his dad’s to celebrate there until Christmas Eve night. While I was out, I got to give most of my niece and nephew’s gifts to them and even watch them unwrap them. I had planned on dropping them off but watching them unwrap was a pleasant unexpected surprise. So Christmas Eve, Jose went straight to his mom’s after work and I went home to finish some cooking and grab the presents and then met him there. After Jose’s sister arrived from the airport, I went to get Nathan and we back to Jose’s mom’s house. We ate our Christmas Eve dinner and opened presents there. We didn’t get home until after midnight. We got home, rushed the boys to bed and brought out the presents…then we went to bed !

Christmas morning I woke up to a quiet house because we had been up so late the night before. I made myself coffee and enjoyed my tree with all the beautifully wrapped presents. I gave thanks for all that we have and all that we can provide. I know that there are many families out there that are in horrible situations and I wish them some peace during this holiday season. CJ woke up sometime after 10am, then he went to wake up Jose and we woke up Nathan together. It was such a great morning. Once presents were all opened, I made a nice big breakfast complete with eggs, bacon, sausage and hash browns. The kids got to enjoy their presents more. I began baking…brownie covered oreos, monkey bread, brownies, and oatmeal lace cookies. Larissa did decide to come over with Brandon. They opened presents and then I made dinner. The day was spent in my PJ’s with my kids. What more could I have asked for? I had everything that I wanted.

What have I learned? I am taking my holiday back. Larissa is already out of the house. Nathan only has a few more years until he is 18. CJ is not that far behind him. I want to enjoy my Christmas with my kids while I still can. This is the beginning of a new tradition. Christmas is mine. I will be selfish and I will not feel guilty about it. I am taking my Christmas back !

This leaves the question of when do we exchange gifts with everyone else. We can continue to exchange presents and celebrate with Jose’s family on Christmas Eve. But what about everyone else? Dalissa, Biance, Mayi, Pedi, Didi, Amy, Lucy, Melanie, Tatiana, Marco etc. I wish that there was a way to do it all in one shot. Wait, there is! We are going to start a new tradition. We are going to have a Christmas gift exchange party either right before or right after Christmas. Since Christmas falls on Thursday next year, we can plan to do it the Friday, Saturday or Sunday after. I will have to be careful to plan around birthdays. But this will allow us to give everyone their gifts still in the Christmas season and actually see everyone and get to spend some time with them without feeling guilty about keeping Christmas all to ourselves.

This Christmas has brought me smiles and change. I am once again looking forward to my holidays !

More pics

I was supposed to be cleaning and wrapping and doing laundry yesterday. What was I doing instead? This is what I was doing...

She has stolen a little piece of my heart. I am so in love with her.

Dejanay is here !

Yesterday I was blessed to welcome another god-daughter, Dejanay, to this world. She was 6lbs and 11oz and she is the chubbiest little butterball there is. I want to take her home and just look at her. I am so happy to be a god-mother yet again. It has been a really long time since I have been able to spoil a little girl and I am going to have so much fun. Without further explanation...here she is:

 

I wanted to share a few pictures of the little bundle of joy. Look at all her hair !
 

 

Here she is with my daughter, Larissa.

 

And here she is with Larissa and my niece, Tatiana. The girls in the family have some great genes because they are beautiful. 

This picture of my daughter and niece makes me smile. To see the two grown girls holding their baby cousin just makes me happy. There are so many years between them right now but one day, when they are all older, the age gap will seem smaller and I hope that the girls have a great relationship.

 

 

My Date with my Niece

I had a date with my niece, Tatiana, last night. I had a great time and we really should do it more often.

Tatiana has grown into such a beautiful and smart young lady. She has been in her apartment for 2 ½ years now and it looks amazing. She does a great job of decorating and keeping up with it. Yesterday, I got to see her tree up too. It made me so proud to see how great she is doing and how beautiful her home is.

We got together because she was feeling depressed. She works for a bank and they have recently been taken over by new ownership. Her manager has changed, her job has changed, they are pouring so much responsibility on her because they know she can handle it and she is getting really stressed. She is in the process of looking for a new job. The concept of the new job is stressing her because she makes good money where she is. She meets monthly goals each month which add to her income and give her a larger salary when added in. She feels a pay cut with a new job. She is stressing the pay cut because she doesn’t just want to work to pay her bills.

She is such a smart lady. She wants to live life and enjoy each day. Some people never figure this out. Sadly, I always thought and dreamed that I would be having this conversation with my own daughter. I wish that I could have these conversations with Larissa. Larissa’s priorities are all screwed up. I hope that she gets her life together and have more important priorities that we can sit down and talk about. I want to go visit my daughters place to have coffee and see all the new cute stuff she got. One day !

Back to my niece…I love you Tatiana. I am so proud of who you are, what you have become and the woman that you are striving to be. Don’t stress the small mistakes, they will only make you stronger and wiser. Keep up the great work.

I am thankful

I know that Thanksgiving has passed but shouldn’t we be thankful every day of the year? I don’t want the season to pass without expressing how much I truly do have to be thankful for.

I can’t believe that it’s December already. I am not even sure where this year went. This year has certainly been full of the good, the bad and the ugly. And although it is so easy to get caught up in all the bad this year, I want to also take time to emphasize all that I have.

We spend the last week on vacation. It was supposed to be Thanksgiving vacation. Originally we were supposed to spend the whole week with Jose’s good friend Kevin and his wife Josie. Well this year they decided to part ways and they are in the process of a divorce. Jose and I don’t realize how lucky we are to have the relationship that we have. I am so thankful for his friendship, for his love, for his respect and for his honesty. He is the best life partner that I could ever ask for. Our relationship has withstood the test of time and I wouldn’t choose anyone else to spend the rest of my life with.

During this vacation, I had a tragedy. My good childhood friend, Cara, passed away. We were so close that I am her daughter’s godmother. She had been sick for some time but you are never prepared for the pain that this brings to all those involved. I am so thankful for every day that I get to spend with my family. We tend to forget that tomorrow is not promised and that we never know when our last day will be. I want to stop my busy life and spend more time enjoying my life. I want to enjoy my life with my kids and Jose. This is actually going to be my goal for 2014. Never too early to start thinking about how to improve the next year.

During this trip, we also toyed with idea of moving to Florida sometime in the future. I say toyed because nothing has been determined. We simply talked about it and looked at some information that might help us make the decision in the future. The bottom line is that we will revisit that idea again after our wedding. In looking at housing prices and trying to do a salary comparison and food comparison and all that good stuff, we realized just how thankful we have been and still are to have all that we have. We have good jobs, we have good cars, we have a nice apartment and we have so many material things beyond what we need. We truly do have so much to be thankful for.

Hampton Inn By Hilton on Jekyll Island, GA

This is a picture of the lobby area at the hotel. I love the feel that it has and it's just what we were hoping for in a hotel.

 

 

This is a picture of one of the suites with a balcony which is what we will have to get ready in at least. They also have double bed options. I love the neutral colors in the rooms. It looks so relaxing to me.

This a picture of the firepit in the back by the pool. I have visions of having s'mores with our guests as we relax at the end of our wonderful day. 

As I get more pictures to post, I will put them up. Just wanted to share some of the things that attracted us to this wonderful hotel.

Here is a picture of the heart in the sand that we have picked for our ceremony. Jose picked it out but I have to say that I have fallen in love with it's simplicity and originality.

Vacation !

We have vacation coming up soon. The planning for this trip was done so far in advance and then it slowly fell apart as the time got closer. The trip is still on but it is not at all what we had originally planned. I know that regardless, those that love us will make time for us and those that don’t really care will be revealed.

Our plan is to head down to NC on Friday night, spend the weekend there and then head to Florida on Sunday night. We will spend three days in Orlando, the last of the three in Legoland. Then we will be meeting Jose’s mom and sister for Thanksgiving and then heading back up to NC to finish off our trip and heading back to RI. There are still some unsettled plans but I am sure that it will be a blast because I will not allow it not to be…lol.

I can’t wait to see Legoland. We had originally planned to do Disney but the cost was much higher than I had expected. Since CJ is a Lego fanatic (that is putting it mildly), it also seemed like the right place to go. I, myself, love Legos too and still enjoy them to this day. Jose’s logic is that CJ might outgrow Legos soon and then that will be out of the question but nobody outgrows Disney so we can go any other time. He has a point but I don’t see CJ outgrowing Legos anytime soon.  The better news is that if CJ really loves it, they are opening a Legoland in Boston, MA next year so we can visit the one right near us.

After this trip, I will have concentrate on Christmas and then…the wedding !

Wedding Hotel

We have the hotel that we will be staying at for our wedding. We will be staying there, it's where we hope our guests will stay and it's also on the beach that we will be getting married on. Originally we were going to get married on Driftwood Beach but we have found that it's very tricky to pinponit the point of day when lowtide is and it's also very limited to space. We are trying to keep the wedding as small as possible but we all know that even our small is not very small. I hear that anything over 30 people would be too crammed and we have over 50.

We have been in constant communication with the wedding planner at The Hampton Inn by Hilton on Jekyll Island and she is amazing. Miriam has been able to help with every question that I have had. I would love to have the reception there at the hotel as well but Miriam is worried that we will not have enough room, especially if it rains. Our plan is to visit in May 2014 for the weekend and spend that weekend with Miriam going over plans. If we can't have it at the hotel, she will help us find a suitable place for us to have our reception.

I will post pictures of the hotel when I get a chance.

Life

Life takes you on twists and turns. Before you know it, you are on a road that you never imagined. I spend some time reading old posts today. I have certainly had my share of hiccups in the road. I am happy to say that Jose and I have weathered the test of time through it.

Unfortunately, my relationship with my daughter is....goodness, I don't even know what you would call it. I guess it's not bad but it is far from good. This past year has been a roller coaster with her and I am happy that we are at least on the terms that we are. She is currently living with her boyfriend, Brandon. I will refrain from saying too may bad things. She is a teenager. She thinks she knows more than I do. She thinks I don't understand what it is like to be her. She is wrong.

Nathan is still struggling with school. He has been on meds and I cringe at the thought that report cards are coming home next week. I am pretty sure that I am not ready for that.

CJ loves school. He has come a long way from the boy who wouldn't speak..lol. He is such a boy. He loves being outdoors, playing in the dirt, and coming home with holes in his jeans. He says he doesn't like math but he is a wizz at it. He also loves to read.

Our wedding plans have been updated. We are getting married on Jekyll Island, GA. I will give you more info when I have more time.

We are currently planning our trip to NC/FL for this Thanksgiving....a trip that almost wasn't going to happen but we went over finances closely and we can make it happen. We were going to take CJ to Disney but that just is not in our budget right now. So we are taking him to Legoland instead. This trip has evolved so many times that I am shocked it's still happening. Josie and Kevin split up and they are getting divorced. That alone has left me feeling sad. As I have watched their relationship unravel though, I realize that it is probably for the best. They are putting each other through so much pain. So our plans to stay with them we canceled of course. Vanessa had surgery last week so my mother-in-law is currently in FL. Vanessa also does not have room for us for Thanksgiving because she has roommates now. It has been a whirlwind. I am trying to stay focused on all the good that is waiting for us on our trip though. Ilga is excited for us to spend time with her. We will get to see Nina & Rob, Amanda & Chris, Paula, Gen & Shannon, Laurel & Scott and...and who knows. We have some pretty amazing people in NC waiting for us to visit.

So that has been what has been going on. Some good, some bad.

Tomorrow is Halloween so maybe I will have some pictures.

News & Updates

Damn, it's been a long time since I have been on here.I am not going to make excuses, it is what it is. Glad to be back though.

I will start by telling you that Jose and I are engaged. He gave me the ring on 5/22 and it is beautiful.

We are getting married 5-10-15. Jose picked the date and is firm. So happens that it is Mother's Day too but we are ok with that. There are also two birthdays that day, Jean Carlo and Bora...so we will have to do something special. It is going to be a destination wedding. Where you ask? Not positive yet. Round and round we go but where we stop, nobody knows...lol. That seems to be the big joke. Originally it was going to be St Augustine, FL. It's such a gorgeous place but it is an hour from the airport and we started thinking that might be an issue. I had a bed & breakfast lined up until the wedding planner there decided he only needed to get back to me when he wanted. We were going to go to the Hilton, which is beautiful but the price per plate was $150 and that is beyond what we can pay. So we started looking in airport locations in Florida but found nothing that really stuck out at us. That led us to look at other places.

There are three things that are not changing. The date is going to be 5-10-15, it is going to be on the beach and it is not going to be in RI. With that being said, we have entertained ideas in Virginia Beach VA, Myrtle Beach SC, Swan Island NC, back to Virginia Beach and now Ocean City, MD. Here is what I know. I really loved the idea of a bed & breakfast because we would all be together in one place, be able to spend time together but still have our rooms to retreat to. But there don't seem to be any bed & breakfasts big enough to have us all together or in locations that we want...namely on a beach. I like the Hilton in St Augustine because although it was a hotel, it has beautiful unique rooms. It doesn't just look like a regular hotel that you would stay at on vacation. I want something that fits our theme and is pretty. We even played around with the idea of renting a big house on the beach and just doing everything there. I have to admit that it sounded so good. We even found a place that might have worked but I don't want to be responsible for taking money from people for our wedding. It would just be too much stress on top of everything else. So our search continued.

Ocean City seems to have what we are looking for in all areas. As we started to really figure things out, we realized that we will need to drive. We will have way too much to transport to put it on a plane and paying for our family to fly would be crazy. So MD fits that issue perfectly. Ocean City has a hotel called Dunes Manor. It is right on the beach, another plus. This hotel is family owned and has some of the features of a bed & breakfast that I love. They have areas where we can congregate and spend time together. It has four restaurants where we can have breakfast together. It has tea time where everyone gets together again and in the evening they have a woman who plays the piano for another chance to gather with family, friends and staff. And although it is a hotel, it does not have a hotel feel. The rooms have been done in beach colors and they are bright an beautiful. Each room has an ocean view and a grand entrance that would make for some amazing wedding pictures.

So looks like it is MD for now. I really do love it and I hope that this is our final spot. I will keep you guys posted on more information as things get finalized.

Inspiration

This is what I am dreaming about my bedroom looking like: