Thankfulness

Once again, it has been a while since I have written. On my drive to work this morning, I had so many things that I wanted to discuss on here but one thing has snuck into my thoughts and managed to engulf my day so that is what I will share today.

The holidays are upon us. Thanksgiving is only a couple of weeks away and Christmas will be here before you know it. This weekend, I somehow got blessed with the Christmas spirit early. I picked up a Christmas CD and instantly was transformed. I baked with the kids, listened to jingles and just really enjoyed myself. I would have put up the Christmas tree with all the spirit and energy that I had but my mother told me that I was insane. Frankly, I think that I agreed with her...lol.

Larissa's party was a success, as all of you know. I owe all of that success to a few people that I could not have done it without. My mother of course who made Larissa's dress, helped me with the centerpeices, and all the little details not to mention help out financially to the best she could and helping me set up the hall. My friend Didi, who came in from RI, helped me plan from A-Z, officiated the ceremony and stayed up with me on Saturday night til 3am helping me put together centerpeices and favors and flowers, ect. Not to mention going with me to get the food and helping me set up the hall too. Then there was Paula. She was my rock that kept me up. She helped me plan the food, helped me with all the odds and ends that she had so I didn't have to buy them, she helped me set up and clean up too. And although she is going through one of the most difficult time in her life, she managed to be there looking incredible with her two girls to make sure that Larissa's day was perfect. And lastly, my friend Kelly...who was at my house helping me transport food, helped me set up and watched CJ for me so that the rest of us could get anything done. Those were my saviors. I am sure they did more than that but that is what I can think of now. And to the rest of you who came and cooked too. I can't thank you enough. I am thankful for all the smiling faces and also thankful for the wonderful food that you helped me provide. I can't thank you all enough. I sincerely could not have done it without y'all. :o)

So with Thanksgiving around the corner, I am realizing how important it really is to be thankful for what you have. There are so many people around me that are in need of so much help right now from jobs to cars to houses and some even food. This economy has effected us all in one way or another. So I have a very strange question to ask you all that I hope you don't take the wrong way. Do you ever think that maybe God had some hand in this economic situation? I mean, we have become such a selfish society placing God at the bottom of our list. We want bigger homes, newer cars, better jobs, more material things, more toys for our kids and we forget to be thankful for all that we have. The roof over our heads, the kids asleep in their beds each night, the food on our tables and the love we have and can share. And most importantly, a God that loves us unconditionaly. Take a moment today to tell all those around you how much you love them because they might not know it and you never know what tomorrow will bring.

I love you all !

Larissa's 15th Birthday

Today is Larissa's 15th birthday. That is insane. It was 15 years ago that I gave birth to one of my many miracles. I can remember it almost like it was yesterday. I remember the long intense hours of labor and the first time I laid eyes on her. I remember thinking how small she was and how fragile she was. Well she is still small and fragile...to an extent. She was 4lb and 7ozs and she was about the size of a cabbage patch doll. So much so that we have her picture of her on Halloween in a cabbage patch doll carrier that one of the nurses had found. Wow...15 years ago. Where does the time go? I remember her first day of day care and her first day of dance. I remember her first day playing soccar and baseball...sports are still not her thing. I remember her first day of kindergarten and then middle school and then high school. I remember the long wait to bring her home from the hospital. The daily trips to the hospital. I also remember the phonecall letting us know that she would be coming home that day. So many memories, so much time and it all seems like it was yesterday.

Today she celebrates her 15th birthday but I celebrate 15 years (and counting) of being blessed with an amazing daughter. A daughter that sometimes blows me away with the way she handles life. Seeing her develop into a young lady has really blown my mind. Don't get me wrong, she is a teenager. She yells, pouts, rolls her eyes and pissed me off daily. She makes mistakes and bad choices just like any other teen too. But her choices in friends, the way that she treats them, her choices in boys and the way that she expects to be treated is just incredible. She just knows things that it takes years for grown woman to learn. Maybe she has learned a few things from her old mother after all. I mean, the only reason I know so much is from learning from my mistakes. I have made many mistakes in my life and the knowledge that comes with getting myself back up and on track is just overwhelming. I try to share all of my learning experiences (that are appropriate) with my daughter but usually just assume that it is going in one ear and out the other. Her actions tell me otherwise though and maybe some of it does sink in though.

So I will enjoy today and know that she is growning and will one day have a life of her own. I worry about the choices she makes about her future, maybe that she isn't taking it seriously enough, maybe that she doesn't understand the responsibility that comes with growing up. Then I look back at me at that age and realize that I had no idea of any of that either. I did grow up though, I did work and get my own place. I learned responsibility. I think that I turned out pretty good if I can say so myself so I will have the same faith in her. A 15 year old beautiful sophomore in high school. I look at her and think that I had to have done a good job raising her. I dread her no longer needing me one day but I know that she will always be my little girl and I will always be her mother.

Thank you God for an amazing daughter.

To Blog or Not To Blog....

...that is the question. I started this blog to keep everyone informed with what is going on with our lives but I guess it has turned into somewhat of a diary for me. My mission of reaching out to everyone at once really isn't working the way that I had intended. Since it's therapeutic to actually sit here and type though, I will continue.

Let's see what has been going on since I last wrote !

LICE, LICE & More LICE
My poor little guy, CJ went through a torturous week this past week. He came home Monday with head lice from day care and it was a battle all week long to try to get each and every last nit out of his hair. If any of you ever end up with lice, call me and I am sure that I can give you recommendations and tell you what you should do. We used Nix, olive oil, mayo, vinegar and some other store bought thing. We washed sheets, pillows, clothes and blankets. We sprayed mattresses, couches and carpets. We bagged decorative pillows and stuffed animals. I don't know how I am still sane but they are finally gone.

Larissa's Birthday
Things have been falling into place nicely. We have the hall, centerpeices, favors, dresses for the girls. All duties have been handed out. Songs and readings have been picked. Readers have been picked. Dress rehearsal scheduled. My mom is making her dress so I don't have to worry about that. I will be picking up her bible, tiara and bouquet this week. Oh, and invites should be done tonight and mailing tomorrow. (I am really behind on these...so not like me)

My Mom
Obviously you know that my mother is coming back if she is making Larissa's dress. She is coming next Wednesday night. I am really excited about her coming back. I have missed her so much and her making Larissa's dress makes it even more special. I fear that we will end up back at the same place after she has been here a while but I am optomistic that the time and relaxation she has had in Portugal will return her with a clear head. She will be returning to Portugal in January for my aunt's surgery and for her recovery. She plans on staying there for a while and once again will not have an official return date. I personally think that her plan is to stay 6 months here and 6 months in Portgual, allowing her to spend half the year with all her kids and grandkids. But she has not officially said that to me, it was just the way that has been talking about things that have led me to believe this.

Me....
I have been on a decorating kick. Slowly I have been getting things for my family room and this past Saturday woke up with tons of energy. I finally moved all of the toys out of the family room and into the play room where they belong. I was able to put up the end tables that I got from another mommy for $10. I was going to spray them black but got tired and decided that I would just put them up the way that they are (silver). Turns out that they look pretty good so I think that I might leave them that way...at least until I get bored with them again. I also put up the table lamps that Ana found for me at yard sales. I like the way that the two different styles look and balance each other. I might still search for a matching set but for now they look really nice. I also painted an area rug. Yes, you heard me right. I am weird, what can I say. I got the idea from a DIY magazine and went for it. I started by painting a 5" border around the edge. I had planned on doing more to it but I just let it dry and decided that I really liked it simple like that. So that too will stay that way until I get bored with it. The simple black has a classic look and it will go with the color changes in the room that I will inevitably go through. I have a coffee table that was another find too. I have it upstairs in my room but don't like it there so it will probably end up coming down to the family room, which is where it was originally intended for. I have black stain that I bought a while back for something else so I think that will be the treatment of choice for that table. It will be a great table to have family game night because the sides fold up for more room. I just need to make sure that CJ doesn't pinch his fingers on it. That is my biggest fear.
So other than that, I am trying to get into couponing. Not very good at it yet. I don't have much patience for it but that is because I don't really understand it quite yet. I am sure that time will fix that. Haven't done much scrapbooking but tons of ideas in my head. Trying to think ahead to Christmas already and that is about it. So I have to go back to my lists for Larissa's party and see what else needs to be done that hasn't been done already. Talk to you guys soon.

Divine Appointment

I got an email today from a friend. This was just a part of it but it really speaks for how I feel at times so I wanted to share it with you guys...

What is a divine appointment? I believe it's a ‘meeting’ which is inspired and led by God. I'm sure you've had those kinds of moments in your life.... those moments when you've experienced "coincidences" or when things just seemed "meant to be.” You know, when you're in EXACTLY the right place at the right time. And the best part is, something wonderful always comes out of moments like these! I love when they come about and look for them on a daily basis! We see the faithfulness of God. we see His hand of restoration in our lives and the lives of others. We see a God that loves us and speaks to us through the whole of our lives. There are moments of grace that continually surround us and the ones we love. If we stay open and receptive, we'll encounter God often, and in powerful ways. “The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD and he delights in his way.” Psalms 37:23 Amen!!

I know...I know...

I am slacking when it comes to writing. Too much is going on in this crazy head of mine and my lunch time, which is the time that I normally write, has been spent doing things for Larissa's birthday.

So let me do a quick catch up yet again:

Larissa is doing...well she is doing the same thing she does every year. She falls behind on a ton of assignments, I get progress reports, then she makes them all up and she gets A's & B's. This stresses me out but apparently it is part of her personality. Must be something from her father's side that she inherited. Her favorite class is Broadcasting. This seems to be her new thing this year. The class is going really well and they even got to make their first of many short ameteur films and I wanted to share with you all. There are some really good parts and other parts not so much. I can't wait to see as they progress with them though. I am not sure how many they will be doing in total. They had to work with camera angles, lighting, and sound. So here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vpw3qDYwoMA . She is also onto another boyfriend. This one is named Ryan. What else is there to say, he is cute and he is nice and let's see how long this one lasts...lmao.

Nathan is doing great in school as usual. He is catching up with his reading level which makes me proud. He continues to do great on projects too. He is back at Karate and working on trying to get another belt. I took him to go see Surrogates last night. I had free tickets to the pre-screening and he was my date. It had been a long time since we had spent some alone time and it was nice. He is so grown and I tend to forget that.

CJ is doing great. He was moved up the 3 year old room on Wednesday and he is adapting really really well. He loves the teachers and he doesn't cry to go to school anymore. He loves going to the big boy room...lol. This room has more educational value, which is what I wanted. He starting to learn about his letters. He is talking more and more and he is doing wonderful with not having accidents. It is amazing to me how much that boy can take in and learn at one time.

I am sure all of you know by now that Jose's grandmother passed away. He is in RI now and the service is tonight. I hope that he is going to be ok tonight. This is his first real big loss and it was tough for him here but I can't imagine him seeing his mother, sister and aunt break down. I don't know what kind of effect that will have on him. Can't wait to have him back on Sunday.

Gotta go...talk to you guys soon. Bye !

CJ is doing GREAT !!!!

This is going to be short and to the point because I don't have too much time but I wanted to share my thoughts on CJ's progress with you all.

CJ started at Elite on August 10th. He is now speaking in sentences, he no longer has his pacifier and he is officially potty trained ! He had to start in the 2 year old room when he started at Elite because he wasn't potty trained. Next week he will be going up to the 3 year old room from 9-11 each day to meet the teacher, meet the kids and get used to the classroom and what they might do differently. If all goes well, and I am sure that it will, he will be moving up to the 3 year old room the week after that on the 28th. It is amazing to me how a little person can take so much in during such a short period of time. He has really grown the past couple of months. My baby is growing up !

So sorry that once again, time has passed and I have not written. It is not that I don't want to, it is that sometimes time does not allow for it at work and at home there is just no time at all. I will try to be back on tomorrow.

My Guardian Angel

Have you ever had a day when you can't seem to get a particular person out of your head? Well I am having that kind of day. I have been having that kind of month but today is the day when it's the strongest.

I haven't gotten over the death of my godmother yet but somehow her death is a little more bearable knowing that I had really said my good-byes to her when she was still in her right mind. I knew the day was coming and I also knew that she was happily waiting for it. Experiencing the death of my godmother though has opened so many feelings from my godfather's death.

It has been 19 years and it still feels like yesterday at times. My godfather was the single most influential man in my life...until now. My godfather was very soft spoken and very reserved unless he was around people that he was really comfortable with. He never argued with my godmother or raised his voice to her. I am sure they argued but never in front of everyone. Airing their dirty laundry just wasn't something that they ever did. They seemed to always be in harmony with each other, finish each other's sentence and know each other's actions before they did it. The marriage that he and my godmother had is what I strive to have some day.

My godfather was a very religious man. It isn't that my godfather would spend hours talking about it or going to church, he just was. He would go to church on Sunday, every Sunday. If we weren't near our church then he would go to any church in the area. It was sacred to him. And his actions showed his love and belief for God. He had a respect for himself, life and his family that just shows a kind of connection with God.

My godfather was a wonderful man and such a big part of my life for the short time he was here. I don't ever remember a time that he let me down or disappointed me. Not that he spoiled me (well, ok, so he did) but he just had this way about him.

He hated to shop but he loved to drive. So, he would tell us all to get ready and he would drive us to a far mall, many trips were made to The Crystal Mall in CT. When we got there my mom and godmother would go shopping and I would hang with my godfather. We would sit and have milkshakes or throw pennies into the fountains or go look at books. He loved books and loved to learn about anything and everything. He would buy a book about the stars and then sit there and read it and then teach it to me. He opened my eyes to so many things through books and by example. I would spend hours with him in the garden or going clam digging.

He encouraged me to do whatever I wanted. He had complete faith in my abilities. I remember he bought this white statue of The Virgin Mary and put it in the yard and Mary stood in this white semi-circle, you know the inlet thing she stands on that surounds her? Well, I sat with him on the porch and made a comment about how white it all was and how beautiful it would be if we could paint a blue sky with clouds in the back so that it looked like she was in heaven. I had seen it done on tv (Bob Ross) but never actually done it. He went and bought the paint and said "go ahead and do it". I was so scared. I was so afraid of messing up his statue. He told me to do it and if I didn't like then we could always paint it white again. I did it and it came out beautiful. It was actually the first time that I painted and it gave me the courage to do more later on. He was so proud of me and he would show anyone who came to the house.

The relationship we had was like no other and it still is. I know that this must sound silly but I guess that today I have been feeling his presence all around me. Like he is really with me and watching over me and my family. It is a feeling that is just so comforting and unexplainable. I just felt like sharing this with you all. Hope everyone is having a great day.